im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
they need to just BURY HIM!
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize