It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
