who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Pants are for mortals
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
