I must be too annoying 4 u.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Randomize