I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
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