I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
