Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
