if i can run in heels then i can drive
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
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