His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
