she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
