I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize