I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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