i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
