I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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