all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
