Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
