you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
