we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
