Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
