I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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