On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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