this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Randomize
