11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
