A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
