I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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