he was CRYING into my vagina
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
