If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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