If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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