Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
