Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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