Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
