You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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