and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
