Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
