Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize