so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Pants are for mortals
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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