hotel room ftw
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
