at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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