your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
