stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
