If i come over, it means nothing
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize