the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
