Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
