38 yer olds are good kisserssss
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize