New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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