This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
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