I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
my being single is dangerous.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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