She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
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