we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
