I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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