no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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